Pennyroyal Tea

One of my long-time favorite CDs is Nirvana Unplugged in New York... MTV

One of the songs from that CD is Pennyroyal Tea, I don't know all the background like which cd that was on originally or whatever. I just wanna talk about the message of that song for a bit now. Okay, first I'm gonna listen to Ben Folds & talk about other things.

My stomach hurts a lot these days. when I eat at night, like dinner time, the food sits in my throat. Today I went to a doctor who specializes in the parts of your body that turn food into energy and crap. he's gonna do an endoscopy and find out what's going on down there.

I don't know why I have these problems but I am gonna make some guesses:
(some "I" statements for psych/counseling people)

1. I worry a lot (seems beyond my control)
2. I eat junk (It's not my fault!)
3. I sleep on my stomach & not well (I can't sleep any other way!)
4. I stay up late (I don't wanna go to bed!)
5. I'm never satisfied. With anything. (Idealists, what can I say?)

Jeez, it's not like I snort, sniff, smoke or shoot any drugs, I should be healthy for crying out loud. I even exercise sometimes!

But I do worry all the time... even when I don't realize it. and I don't breathe right, I think. I should meditate or do yoga. I need to settle down. My legs shake when I sit for a while. Imagine trying to tell a bunch of first graders to sit still while your feet are tapping beyond control.

So I sit and drink my chamomile tea and hope to settle down soon.

The words I remember of that song come to me as I self-medicate. I was gonna try and listen to the song on the ipod, but that's not working with the computer right now, blah blah blah.

sit and drink pennyroyal tea
distill the life that's inside of me
sit and drink pennyroyal tea
i'm anemic royalty
.......
I'm on warm milk and laxatives
Cherry-flavored antacids


Well I'm not on warm milk, cuz that sure won't stay down. This is all a bit dramatic, but it's fun. Food is really unnecessary, right? Maybe I'll just get a portable IV & never have to physically eat again.... but as Peregrin Took says in The Two Towers, after drinking "food" from the walking trees, that liquid food is very refreshing, but there's something about solid food that is more satisfying. Who needs satisfaction, really. Not me.